Plethora
I have so many things rolling around in my head these days.
Thoughts and ideas and wonderings...
Questions and doubts and fears...
I generally have no one to actually talk to about these things, but I'm realizing I must express them. Most are too personal for this blog, so I've taken to writing them down. I've never been a big journal-er... although some might assume the contrary. Nevertheless, this is a big step for me. To some extent it's been extremely helpful. At least I'm getting the thoughts out of the cyclone that is my brain and on to some other medium that will relieve me from the stress of thinking about them.
Sometimes I solve my own 'problems'. Sometimes I come up with a great list of brainstormed ideas. Sometimes it's like excellent therapy. I share some of these things with my Life Coach and it brings me one step closer to my 2007 goal of 'clarity'.
Sometimes, however, I dig myself deeper into a state of despair. The problems, when laid out in writing before me seem too big, too overwhelming, too unconquerable. I discover new, hidden difficulties. I realize that all those who think that I'm so much 'less' than they are are absolutely right.
So many things rolling around in my head. How to reconcile them all? How to put order in the midst of my personal mental chaos? It's as if my mind is multi-tasking all the things it wants to think about, but in the process is mixing them all together into one incomprehensible mish-mash of confusion.
Writing some of the things down when they come to mind, however, has helped. I feel as if I am Professor Dumbledor of Harry Potter fame... he had too many things in his mind to think about, to remember, to process, to handle. So he took his all-powerful magic wand, touched it purposefully to his temple, extracted a few memories and put them into the giant cauldron where they would be eternally safe and 'dealt with' until he needed to refer to them again.
I guess my pen, in this case, is my all-powerful magic wand. Sifting through the plethora of agonizing thoughts that are swirling through my brain, pulling some out for the time being and relieving me of the task of mulling them over again and again.
The last month of this new journaling habit has been helpful. I hope the future proves just as productive and that my thoughts get sorted out into some distinguishable reality.
~lk
Thoughts and ideas and wonderings...
Questions and doubts and fears...
I generally have no one to actually talk to about these things, but I'm realizing I must express them. Most are too personal for this blog, so I've taken to writing them down. I've never been a big journal-er... although some might assume the contrary. Nevertheless, this is a big step for me. To some extent it's been extremely helpful. At least I'm getting the thoughts out of the cyclone that is my brain and on to some other medium that will relieve me from the stress of thinking about them.
Sometimes I solve my own 'problems'. Sometimes I come up with a great list of brainstormed ideas. Sometimes it's like excellent therapy. I share some of these things with my Life Coach and it brings me one step closer to my 2007 goal of 'clarity'.
Sometimes, however, I dig myself deeper into a state of despair. The problems, when laid out in writing before me seem too big, too overwhelming, too unconquerable. I discover new, hidden difficulties. I realize that all those who think that I'm so much 'less' than they are are absolutely right.
So many things rolling around in my head. How to reconcile them all? How to put order in the midst of my personal mental chaos? It's as if my mind is multi-tasking all the things it wants to think about, but in the process is mixing them all together into one incomprehensible mish-mash of confusion.
Writing some of the things down when they come to mind, however, has helped. I feel as if I am Professor Dumbledor of Harry Potter fame... he had too many things in his mind to think about, to remember, to process, to handle. So he took his all-powerful magic wand, touched it purposefully to his temple, extracted a few memories and put them into the giant cauldron where they would be eternally safe and 'dealt with' until he needed to refer to them again.
I guess my pen, in this case, is my all-powerful magic wand. Sifting through the plethora of agonizing thoughts that are swirling through my brain, pulling some out for the time being and relieving me of the task of mulling them over again and again.
The last month of this new journaling habit has been helpful. I hope the future proves just as productive and that my thoughts get sorted out into some distinguishable reality.
~lk
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