Thinking

"Forgiving is a journey, sometimes a long one, and we may need some time before we get to the station of complete healing, but the nice thing is that we are being healed en route.  When we genuinely forgive, we set a prisoner free and then discover that the prisoner we set free was us." 

~ Lewis B. Smedes.

"If we are harboring unforgiveness toward someone, we'll find that our usefulness [for HIM] is sadly diminished." ~ Alistair Begg

"God's spirit gives us the power to forgive those people that criticize us, irritate us, belittle us, deceive us, abuse us, betray us....When you choose to forgive an unrepentant offender, you forgive the offender for your own good.  You are the one who will benefit from one-sided forgiveness.  Your choice to forgive, or not to forgive, will not affect the offender's feelings in any way.  You and I can't make anyone feel our pain or experience guilt for a deliberate action against us.  You can, in no way, make your offender suffer like you are suffering." ~Denise George

I am having an amazing study on the topic of forgiveness.  These quotes above are just some of the things that have encouraged me and challenged me as I work on my journey toward a more forgiving heart toward those who have offended and hurt me.  

I love the word 'journey'.  It is so appropriate... and so encouraging!  A forgiving heart does not have to be cultivated overnight.  The natural response toward offense and hurt is *not* to forgive.  It is to fight... to be angry... to avenge... none of which are productive or pleasing to the Lord.   I am therefore engaged in a constant struggle against the natural human response and am endeavoring to develop a Godly response that will bring help, healing, forgiveness and wholeness... for me, and hopefully for the relationships that the forgiveness concerns.  It is not a struggle that I win every day.  Right now, I generally give up when the going gets tough.  I give in to the anger that wants to consume me.  I go back on the promise I've made not to criticize my offenders, not to gossip about those who have hurt me, not to wish (a moderate amount of ) ill for them as they pay the consequences for "all" to which they have subjected me.

However, God does not expect me to finish my journey all in one day.  It would be nice, but it is definitely not expected.  Therefore, I press on.  I continue the struggle.  I mark my progress in months and years, not necessarily in hours, days and weeks. 

A journey toward forgiveness.  Not easy, not fast.  But worth it.  Peace and a loving, forgiving heart await me at the end.  I look forward to the day when I can truly claim that very valuable prize of a changed heart that will bring me true freedom and when I can look back on the journey to realize how God has been faithful, patient and kind every step of the way.

~lk